"You're Better Than Nothing"

I know I can be very self-deprecating. I have visions of grandeur and of course the vision never matches up with what really happens. In my younger days I use to get so down on myself. One little bobble could fester and lead me into the depths of despair. It's that glass half empty, half full thing. I unfortunately and often see things as half empty, but I have this little mental trick I use to turn myself around. I tell myself, "You're better than nothing!" Now that doesn't sound like much - BETTER THAN NOTHING, but I envision that without my doings, there would be nothing. I try to look at my positive impact instead of what went wrong.

So when I'm asked at the last minute to play the piano to accompany a hymn and hit what seems to me a gazillion clinkers; instead of being devastated by it all, I just say, "I'm better than nothing!" When I get asked to sing and forget the words or miss a note; I just say, "It was better than nothing!" I say those words with great confidence for I know Satan would love to have me down and out.

I took a painting class at our local college a few years ago. I was feeling discouraged because I couldn't reproduce what I saw in my mind onto the canvas. My instructor, Mr. Glen Knowles, was an outstanding teacher. He saw my discouragement and frustration and simply said, "You need to get over it!" I so admired his work and at first thought he couldn't understand where I was coming from, but he assured me that he had never really painted anything exactly the way he saw it in his mind. I thought about that. I knew I was learning and progressing. Painting a masterpiece in the beginning is really unthinkable. I related his comment to my own experience with piano. More than once I have had to encourage a piano student who was discouraged because they weren't measuring up or playing like they wanted to.

The parable of the talents is a great guide in showing what happens if we don't utilize what we have been given, the servant said, "I was afraid, and went and hid thy talent in the earth." Those who become downcast or afraid become stifled. Their talents then lay hidden, locked away, and eventually lost.

Admittedly, my BETTER THAN NOTHING theory is not perfect in providing me an escape from discouragement. Case in point, I've been subbing nearly everyday since school started this year. The more I have substituted the more confident I have become though some days are better than others when it comes to my effectiveness in the classroom. With my one-day appearance I'd like to think I'll have an incredible influence in the lives of all the children in my class. The reality is I might make a dent here or there in the life of a child as we pace through a hopefully educational day.

This week I found myself in a classroom of severely handicapped 4th and 5th graders. There were 14 children, all present. All I found was a brief outline on the desk to guide me through the day. I immediately quizzed the four para-educators I would be working with. I soon realized I was the substitute for the substitute. These children had had two different substitutes in the last two weeks and I entered the classroom as number three. Doing the math, I surmised that this class had only been functioning for two weeks before, whatever the reason, the teacher was gone for the next two weeks. With it being a brand new school, a new school year, and whatever other reasons; the guidance I was hoping for from my helpers was very limited. I could see in their eyes they were definitely looking to me for support. Happily about a third of the class recognized me from previous subbing encounters the year before and they were happy to see me.

I don't know how that class is really supposed to run, but with my limited knowledge and a prayer in my heart; I put a smile on my face and jumped in. Yes, I had some initial anxiety wondering what to do next, but I moved forward and felt the peace of the Spirit. The other adults were quick to follow my lead. I certainly appreciated their help. I couldn't have done it without them. I had a parent come in to observe the class for part of the day and I had to deal with some behavior you wouldn't find in a "normal" classroom, but I know I was guided.

After school I sat alone writing my report and pondering. I wondered if I had made a difference? Did I look like the latest dog and pony show with my reading antics and singing production? Or had I been a viable teacher for these students? I couldn't say for sure; I had been left with so little to go on. As I evaluated my day, one of the para-educators stepped back into the room. She had been out fulfilling her responsibility of walking some of the children to the bus. She stood at the door and thoughtfully and quietly said, "I wanted to tell you . . . It was a pleasure working with you today. You really ought to leave your number. You're the best substitute we've ever had." I'm sure I had a surprised look on my face, but I also had a great sense of relief flow through me as I heard her words. I sincerely thanked her and finished my report, which always includes my sub number and phone numbers.

Now repeat after me:

"You're better than nothing.
You're better than nothing.
You're better than nothing."

And it really helps when someone says you did a great job.

"There is no effect

more disproportionate to its cause

than the happiness

bestowed by a small compliment."

Robert Brault

and

"I can live for two months

on a good compliment."

Mark Twain

There is not doubt,

God truly was my strength.

I'm so thankful!

We're Legal!

I finally got a cell phone that is bluetooth worthy. It's the law in California - Hands Free, Baby! But I didn't want to spend the money to buy a new phone. Naughty me! I've been sneaking around for over a year without one. I purchased a speaker for my car instead of an ear piece and I'm very happy with it. I hope you can hear me! I'm forever talking in the car as I go about my daily doings.

Janna too took a big step and got her license last week. She was very nervous during her driving practice and in taking the driving test; but in spite of her anxiety, she did very well. Janna doesn't seem too intimidated now. She's all over town doing errands for me and driving to school. I'm so grateful for her help even though Erma Bombeck's sage advice is:

"Never lend your car to anyone

to whom you have given birth."

One Year Mark

Elder Blair is all about Texas.

And from what I hear . . .

the Texans are all about him.

Tommy is happily serving in the Lone Star State.

Today is his one year mark.

CALLED TO SERVE

By Grace Gordon, alt.

Called to serve him,

heav’nly King of glory,

Chosen e’er to witness for his name,

Far and wide we tell the Father’s story,

Far and wide his love proclaim.

Onward, ever onward,

as we glory in his name;

Onward, ever onward

as we glory in his name;

Forward, pressing forward,

as a triumph song we sing.

God our strength will be;

press forward ever

Called to serve our King.

Listen to the Tabernacle Choir sing this favored song -
on my sidebar, just click the play arrow.

Elder Blair - Texas.

A Mama Drama

My friend's blog is titled "A Mama Drama", but I'm taking the title for my post today. Everyday really is a mama drama when you think about the ups and downs of life. Today's drama entailed Janna getting her license. We've had weeks of "drama driving". I'm so glad she was successful. Now we've got to concentrate on her learning the stick shift.

Today my mother fell. I won't talk about that. Suffice it to say, "She's alright in spite of the drama!"

I scheduled eleven more jobs today. Four consecutive days for one teacher and seven Fridays for another. I'll be subbing while they're attending workshops. "Hip, Hip, Hooray! I've got work!"

I went to Back-to-School Night with Sam this evening, that was the calm part of my day. I was happy to share a bit of time with him.

I'm off to spend the night at my parents and hoping for less drama in my busy days.

"Save the drama for yo mama."

It's telling someone to stop yappin', stop complaining about what's wrong with this, what's wrong with that, and why you've got it so hard.--from Urban Dictionary

I Can't Believe It!

I worked the second day of school and I have three more jobs scheduled. One is a first for me, I'm teaching junior high music tomorrow. Wish me luck! It's all amazing to me and I'm grateful.

"Wonder of wonders,

miracle of miracles..."

Sheldon Harnick

Back to School

Over the summer I caught a glimpse of a few kids I substituted last year. Most were busy with their families and very much unaware of me, but at Chuck E. Cheese last month one former fourth grader was having a birthday party. He was roaming about the place like everyone else. He was so happy to be there. He finally crossed my path enough times that he glanced my way. I could see by the expression in his face that he wondered if I recognized him. Through my eyes and the smile on my face, I acknowledged him from across the room. He held his hand up shly and rippled his fingers a few times to wave his recognition of me. Then he was off to play, not worried about school, but happy to have a summer fun filled day. But now it's...

Janna started school today. Sam starts tomorrow. So that means I could start working again. I wonder how much I will be working? Fifty laid off teachers have been added to the substitute teaching pool. My heart sank when I found that out. As I pondered the situation, the Spirit assured me that I would have the work that I needed, so I am at peace about it all.

It's not like I don't have anything to do around here. My parents have occupied the bulk of my time this summer trying to provide 24-hour care in their home. We're setting my mom up with an emergency button, our caregiver has increased her time, my girls are going to tradeoff afternoons during the week senior sitting, and I'll take the weekends. I even have my sister-in-law, JoLinda, here to help us get through the week while we wait for our emergency alert system to show up.

If I don't work much initially at school, it will be a good opportunity for me to get something done around my very neglected house. I've got plenty to do around here, there's no doubt about it!

"Education is not preparation for life;

education is life itself."

John Dewey

Dodger Wrap-up

Janna and Sam at Dodger Stadium

Dodger's won the Atlanta Braves last night.

It was one more thing that added to a memorable evening.

"Baseball games are like snowflakes and fingerprints,

no two are ever alike."

W. P. Kinsella

Singing Dodger Blues

Janet auditioned July 18th for the Mormon Night at Dodger Stadium "Star Spangled Banner" competition. We were all rooting for her, but she didn't make the final six. Why, I don't know?

Wish she was singing. Janet enjoyed participating in the try-outs, but she'll have other opportunities to perform.

Hugh, Sam, and Janna are attending the game tonight. It will be a fun time - being together, the game, Dodger dogs and all, but Janet's solo would have really topped it off.

"A hot dog at the ballgame
beats roast beef at the Ritz."

Humphrey Bogart

TWO ARRIVALS

Grandma, Bill, Chelsea, and Ryan
during an earlier visit this month.

My mother came home two day ago. She has been either in the hospital or the skilled care facility (nursing home) since June 4th. She's settling in and hopefully all will go well.

Janna with Shisa Dog at Shuri Castle

It's "Sayonara" to Okinawa and "Hello" to California. Janna came home yesterday and we're so glad to have her back. Wendy and Rick were great hosts. It seems they did something everyday to enlighten Janna during her stay. What a great trip!

鳶が鷹を産む。

Tonbi (or Tobi) ga taka wo umu

Literally: A kite breeding a hawk.

Meaning: A splendid child born from common parents.

COWABUNGA!!!!!

Janna on zip line

A brief report about Janna in Okinawa. She's having a great time. Can't wait to get more details about her fun vacation. It's obviously an empowering trip.

Four-character Idiom:

花鳥風月

Kachou Fuugetsu

Literally: Flower, Bird, Wind, Moon

Meaning: Experience the beauties of nature,

and in doing so learn about yourself.

Pioneer Day is Everyday

It's Pioneer Day and I wanted to express my thanks to the pioneers of old and of today. In both cases, I so admire and am inspired by their strength and testimonies.

"Whenever I think about pioneers,
I think of brave women and men."
Della Dalby Provost

"What Are We Busy About?"

Before we begin our week we try to go through our calendar and discuss as a family our schedules. For example, who has to go where and when, and then work out the logistics of it all.

We've always been a busy bunch and sometimes choices need to be made as we line up our doings with our priorities. One com-

ment, "Somebody's gotta watch the kids!?" is often interjected into the conversation by Hugh or I. It has become a standard statement of our frustration when we find ourselves on overload and it seems our lives are being pulled every which way.

We're always busy! That's nothing new, but my parents care has been added to the mix. I find myself saying, "Somebody's gotta watch Grandma and Poppy!?" I'm in a quandary as to what to do about their situations. We're riding out the summer for now with the help of family and friends.

"It's not enough to be busy. So are the ants.

The question is: What are we busy about?"

Henry David Thoreau

Poppy and Grandma during better days,
serving as missionaries in Nauvoo, Illinois.

OKINAWA OR BUST

We ventured to LAX yesterday to get Janna started on a two-week vacation visiting her brother, Rick and family in Okinawa. She happily, but tentatively took on the challenge of her first solo flight, which was international no less. She arrived in Okinawa today in spite of our worry and concern. I'm so excited for her! What a great opportunity.

Japanese Proverb:

虎穴に入らずんば虎子を得ず

Koketsu ni irazunba koji wo ezu.

Literally: If you do not enter the tiger's cave,

you will not catch its cub.

Meaning: Nothing ventured, nothing gained.

OR

You can't do anything without risking something.

HELLO OUT THERE!

You may have thought I dropped off the face of the planet, or maybe I'm just feeling that way. I have been extraordinarily busy. Busy with my parents mostly. They have been declining for some years now and they are especially down at this time. I'm not sure what we are going to do concerning their situation, so I pray and ponder, wondering what's next.







I've also been busy with Cub Scout Day Camp. It was four full days last week. I'm tired and trying to get back on my feet.





We've had lots of visitors just like last summer. Most the people are coming to see my parents, but we host who comes and are happy to visit too.

Even though my days are busy and sometimes overwhelming, I can still see miracles and blessings along the way. Today for example, the Hood family invited us for a 4th of July BBQ. They made my birthday-Independence Day celebration very easy. I'm usually cooking up something for the holiday and having a gathering myself, but it just couldn't be that way this year. Their invitation is just one of many small miracles that have come our way. The Hood and Jueschke families were delightful company.

I cannot begin to tell of all my doings this summer. I cannot acknowledge every kindness here either. It is sufficient to say, inspite of difficulties, I am feeling very grateful.

“Be patient in afflictions,

for thou shalt have many;

but endure them,

for, lo, I am with thee,

even unto the end of thy days.”

(D&C 24:8)